Stay At Mom - part 2 - from a less emotional view

I only have a few minutes, but I wanted to add a few additional comments. First of all, I wanted to thank everyone for the support comments. I know there are tons of women who stay home with their kids and many are super moms, someday I hope to be more like all of you! I wanted to take a minute and add somethings that I have been thinking of since I posted this post. My point was not that I, personally, want recognition for what I do, but more that I want society to recognize the importance of it. I know that women go to work for a lot of reasons. I know that some need to feel the fulfillment of a career, others do it out of necessity to care for their families. I'm not saying that many don't have legitimate reasons for doing it. I have my reasons for staying home. I will share a few of those but I wanted to add that all reasons aside, we live in a society where we are told to be accepting of everyone no matter what - so why does that NOT apply to people trying to do what they think is right?
I said in my last post that staying home with my kids is the "right thing to do." In a world where the line between right and wrong is so blurred you may wonder what I mean by it being "right." So, here are my reasons... My number one reason for staying home is that a prophet of God said, "Husband and wife have a solemn responsibility to love and care for each other and for their children. 'Children are an heritage of the Lord' (Psalms 127:3). Parents have a sacred duty to rear their children in love and righteousness, to provide for their physical and spiritual needs, to teach them to love and serve one another, to observe the commandments of God and to be law-abiding citizens wherever they live. Husbands and wives-mothers and fathers - will be held accountable before God for the discharge of these obligations. The family is ordained of God. Marriage between man and woman is essential to His eternal plan. Children are entitled to birth within the bonds of matrimony, and to be reared by a father and a mother who honor marital vows with complete fidelity. Happiness in family life is most likely to be achieved when founded on the teachings of the Lord Jesus Christ. Successful marriages and families are established and maintained on principles of faith, prayer, repentance, forgiveness, respect, love, compassion, work, and wholesome recreational activiites. By divine design, fathers are to preside over their families in love and righteousness and are responsible to provide the necessities of life and protection for their families. Mothers are primarily responsible for the nurture of their children. In these sacred reponsibilities, fathers and mothers are obligated to help one another as equal partners. Disability, death, or tother circumstances may necessitate individual adaptation. Extended families should lend support when needed." That's it. A prophet of God told me that it is my responsibility to care for the children, to nurture them. I can't think of a way to do that except to be WITH them.
I have a degree in psychology. It doesn't mean much, except for the fact that I took a bunch of classes in college and I focussed a lot of them on children and development. One of the things I learned there is that children attach themselves to their primary caregiver. This is the strongest bond created that allows the child to feel safe and secure and aids in proper development. There is a bond that is between parent and child, no matter the daily routine, but the greater bond is between child and primary caregiver. I imagine that if you send your child off to a daycare center, where there are several providers who switch off, the child will fail to attach to anyone and this can have developmental consequences because their physical needs are met, but not many of their emotional needs. If you send the child to someone's home, where there is one provider but lots of children, the child will bond to that provider but not necessarily have all of their emotional needs met. If you have a babysitter, nanny, au pair, etc. come into your home, this is ideal because the child will bond to the provider and usually have more of his or her emotional needs met. In this case, parents will be seen as an authority figure, but not a secure bond, like when I send my kids off to school, they have a similar bond with their teacher. Now what happens to a child who forms this bond with a caregiver and then the provider goes to a different daycare center, the nanny leaves for college, or the parents find a cheaper option? The child will morn a loss, because it's like having a parent die. Then they attach to the next caregiver and it all happens again. I don't think it's fair to the child and not something that they should be put through. My point is that when I say I'm doing the right thing, I mean it's the best choice for my children - or any children. No one can argue that a day care center is AS GOOD AS having a parent stay home. My biggest pet peeve is that people have children with no intention of raising them. It is not the job of a babysitter or the school to teach personal morality. I had an experience this last Spring that I think speaks volumes and makes my point perfectly. I was at the playground with my kids and talking with a friend. At the same park there were 2 nannies who had come to talk while the kids they watched played. One of the boys had brought his bike to ride around the track. This boy, probably around 5 or 6, brought his bike over near me and rode very slowly towards me, he ran into my leg with his bike. I thought maybe he had done it on accident so I ignored him. He then backed his bike up and ran into me again. I looked over my shoulder and saw that the nanny was looking in my general direction but was still talking to her friend. I was annoyed. I softly asked the boy not to run into me again. I watched as the boy backed up and came right towards me again. I was now angry. I leaned down, grabbed his bike and firmly said, "Stop! It is rude and inappropriate to run into people with your bike. You need to stop NOW. Do not do it again." I felt like putting him in timeout, but knew that would never work, I then turned around and saw that the nanny wasn't even watching - it made me angry. I was about to find out who he was and knock on his door to talk to his parents, but he didn't run into me again, so I let it go. If the mom had been there, I am confident that I would not have needed to discipline him. It's late and I need to go to bed so I will leave with this: I agree that there are some women that it would not be better for them to be around their children all day long - it's certainly not easy and not for everyone - those are the families that should consider having a stay at home dad.